


Normality

by amuk



Category: Bleach
Genre: Community: 31_days, Family, Friendship, Gen, Introspection, Loss, Nostalgia, Powerlessness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-21
Updated: 2013-01-21
Packaged: 2017-11-26 07:58:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/648321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amuk/pseuds/amuk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He doesn't miss it--the clashing of blades and gritting teeth, the connection that comes when two souls face each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Normality

**Author's Note:**

> The best thing about taking Kendo? I can actually follow the fights now! XD  
> Set between end of Aizen arc and beginning of new arc.
> 
> Day/Theme: December 08 // Your sweet symmetry, all shattered.

Life is as it was, as it should be. He wakes up, senses alert, watching the slightest shadow for a shift of movement, the rustle of cloth.  
  
All he finds is his father, jumping at him, that idiotic look on his face before he realizes he's sailing clear out the window.  
  
(It's hard to connect this blubbering man with the one who stood beside him, back straight and proud, confidentially gripping his sword.)  
  
Yuzu makes breakfast, as usual, a little taller now as time passes. Karin is grouchy and attacking invisible (only now) beings and...  
  
Life is as it was.  
  
Except for when its not.

  
-x-

There are a few things Ichigo will never admit to anyone, not even to Chad or Rukia (but he can't see her anymore, can he?).  
  
He can't really admit them to himself either and spends time instead in a state of half denial and half resignation.

  
-x-

It's almost out of habit that Ichigo pauses at the street light, looking down at the absent wreath of flowers.  
  
There are no ghosts, not anymore. None to give him doleful looks as the days turn into years and their memories turn into ash. None to bother him or plead or run from the impending terror of a hollow.  
  
(No black cloaks or silent steps or fierce duels or...)  
  
The street is empty, as it should be, and he tries not to reach out for a past that's gone by.

  
-x-

He doesn't miss the powers. Or the people. Or anything.  
  
His life is as it should be. There are no power struggles or the weight of the world resting on his shoulder. He doesn't need to wake up at every noise, wary of some monster in the dark, nor does he need to train until his knuckles bleed and he can't see straight.  
  
There is nothing to miss.  
  
(not even her cocky smirk or his stupid grin or his weak smiles or her shameless posing)  
  
(nothing)

-x-

It's not uncommon, at first, for him to wake up reaching for Zangetsu.  
  
(For him to reach for that other piece of his soul)  
  
Not uncommon for his hand to stop part way, to remember that broken look and those quiet tears. And the resignation that came when he learned that final move.  
  
His fingers clench and his eyes stubbornly remain shut and all he can see now is darkness.  
  
There are no cities, submerged in the sea or shrouded in rain. Just him and this emptiness.

  
-x-

It's not uncommon now, months later, to stop making any of those movements. He doesn't look around corners or listen for noises that don't come. Doesn't wait for a grating voice reprimanding him or scorn horrible scribbles.  
  
His body is starting to forget and the only way his mind doesn't follow in suit is because of that small, useless badge.

-x-

  
This is another thing he won't admit, something beyond the missing and wanting and wishing:  
  
When that man appears with his father's picture, Ichigo feels something besides worry and suspicion.  
  
Adrenaline spikes through his system--something is finally going to happen.  
   
He resists the urge to smile.


End file.
